INT. LIVING ROOM - DAY
A text alert sounds on Amy’s phone.
OH! I have an audition! GAH! Okay, okay, calm down. You can do this. Someone will be able to take care of the baby, right? Ehh, but it’s right during his nap, so they might have to put him down, which is easy for me, but anyone else will have ENDLESS trouble! And IF I do book the job, who in the world do I trust to spend the WHOLE day with him?! Who would even WANT to do that?! GAAHHH!
INT. CASTING OFFICE - DAY
Amy waits in a lobby surrounded by other actors. A door opens revealing a CASTING DIRECTOR.
Amy, are you ready?
I’m not proud to admit that for a pretty long while after having my baby the above scene would play out every time I got an audition. My brain turned into that screaming porg from the new Star Wars trailer (and not in an adorable way). The stress was taking a toll on my psyche and my abilities to be fully present for my auditions. I slowly started to realize that my horrible mindset was probably a major thing holding me back from booking work. I thought, “hmmm, I should really put intention (and actual action) into finding and regularly using good childcare so that when I have auditions and WHEN I book a job, I won’t be filled with panic and it will just be a normal thing for both me and the baby.”
I know this SOUNDS stupidly obvious and simple, but if you’re a parent you know this can actually be a hard transition to make. There are all these dumb bonding hormones and that crazy guilt stuff that can get in the way. I started looking at daycares, but I was so wishy-washy and indecisive - “Is he ready? Do I really NEED daycare? Is he ready? I feel guilty sending him away when I don’t really need to! Is he ready? What if he gets sick? Is he ready? AM I READY?!”
Obviously these questions were getting us nowhere. I finally realized that we were never going to be “ready”. If I waited until we were “ready” we’d be going to daycare when most families are prepping for the SATs. So we leapt out of our cozy, familial comfort zone and started going to daycare a few mornings a week (Well, my son did. I cleaned the bathrooms. Thanks, nervous energy!). In the beginning it was a little rough. There was separation anxiety and a lot of tears (pro-tip: do your make-up AFTER daycare drop-off). But each time got easier: I saw pictures of my son playing with blocks, the other kids were always excited to see him, and one day when I came to pick him up he was happy and excited instead of hysterical at the sight of me. I knew everything was going to be fine. And, guess what, guys? I BOOKED A JOB!!
All of this is my long-winded way of saying, mindset is key. If you have something in your life that may be subconsciously sabotaging your auditions, you need to do everything in your power to get that part of your life under control so that you can feel free to rock it and book it. And believe me, it’s not enough to just think, “Oh, well, I know that there are many options for childcare and we can just cross that bridge when we come to it, right?” (HA! You can see how well that was working!). For me, it took actually seeing my son doing well in other people’s care before I finally felt my mindset shift from “I want to book work!” to “I CAN book work.”
POST CREDITS EPILOGUE - INT. LIVING ROOM - DAY
A text alert sounds from Amy’s phone.
OH! I have an audition! YES!!
How about you? What part of your life do you need to get in order so that you can book work? Leave me a comment below and maybe we can puzzle through it together. I’ll try to help in anyway I can.
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